Sometimes no news is good news

I've been focused on the travel blog lately. And, since my own life is just merrily coasting along, I don't have a lot to write. Or, time to write. Work is busy, but great.  Same can be said for the family, so I guess things are all.....right!  Nothing to complain about but the weather. Nope, hold on, that's been pretty great too.

No news is good news.

Cheers!

90 days or so

Well this is kind of embarrassing. How can I really call myself a writer when it's been at least 90 days since I've even said "hello" here?

I can say that life is much of the same. I took a quick solo trip (to Bermuda) to try to charge my personal battery enough to tackle another ice cream season.  Then I opened the store. Then I've basically kept my head down and worked like a plow horse ever since. I said "plow horse" this time instead of donkey, trying to be kind to myself. But, a dumb little donkey is about what I am anyway.

I continue to allow people to use me as a doormat... to add their burdens to my load and to take whatever they need and leave me with scraps. So, at least I'm consistent.

I've tried my best to be happy. I started a "happy page" and tried to see each day as a glass half full. That worked for about 70 or so of the 100 days that was supposed to be that project. Without going back to read, I think I can say that my kids, my dogs, jokes and coffee are about all the things with the power to make me smile.

I also started reading a book called the Happiness Project. Meh. I got about 70 pages into it before I fell asleep. The sleep was awesome though. I remember that much!

Hockey season is almost over, so that's good. The kids need a rest. I need a break from those payments. I do plan to take the kids to Florida for a couple days, so that's good. We'll laugh and swim and sit in the sunshine. That will make me happy!

More with Air Miles

I am pretty focused on travel and anytime I can go anywhere for free, or nearly free, I'm quite excited. Tonight my son asked if he could have a new snowboard. I replied that it wasn't in the budget right now. Of course I feel guilty for that answer, and then I started thinking creatively and took a look at the Air Miles site.

It wasn't long before I was perusing ski passes, and fun outdoor equipment like these snowshoes. Now I didn't find what he was after, but I may have found a couple things that would please him and make me feel better too.

Things I didn't know...

Five years ago, there are many things I didn't know about myself. Things I could not have predicted. I should work on a big list, but right now I'll just share 3.

1) I didn't know how important my hockey family would be. The kids' teammates, parents and coaches are the people we spend the most time with. And, they are really great. They are so supportive of all the kids. I know if my child needed something.... anything, from $2 for juice or advice, or a kick in the rear, they would do it. And I would definitely do it for them and their kids. After a few years of the same core group growing together, I can really say this has improved my quality of life, sense of community and belonging.

2) A year is a long time. But it is absolutely nothing either. When you are stuck in the day to day, it can feel like nothing is accomplished, but when you reflect back on a year, it can seem like a lifetime ago. I really do think social media, like Facebook and Twitter have screwed with our sense of time. When we can receive updates from around the world, every hour, or even by the minute, it affects our sense of personal time and accomplishment. But so much of the information is white noise.

3) I didn't recognize 5 years ago that I'm a runner. Not in the literal sense. I wouldn't strap on sneakers and run unless someone scary was chasing me. But in the personality sense... I flee. When I stress, I want to flee/run/bolt/escape.  I've read, that it's easier to change your location, than your life and that's why people travel. For me, I think that nails it.  I have learnt that I LOVE travel. It's a passion. But I also don't think it's about the destination, or learning or exploring. I honestly think I can say it's my sanity break or my re-start button. Now, I don't think this is earth shattering, or unique but I'm glad to have recognized it.

Simply Fabulous Friends

Today, I was feeling pretty low and then something awesome happened. I got a chance to see three of my friends, each at work, doing their thing. Each told me that I looked lousy. Each asked me how I was. One went so far as to ask me repeatedly if I was ok, or maybe sick, or maybe just in need of a vacation. He simply wouldn't let me "get away" with the stat, "I'm fine."

What happened next was awesome. They each helped. Heather, who is a massage therapist worked on my back and wrist and helped take away my pain. But she also made me laugh. We laughed a lot.

At the grocery store, Greg made me laugh too. He mocked my purchases and wouldn't let me leave the store without the flyer's weekly bonus points. It feels great to have a friend who knows me that well and makes the effort to turn my day around.

And Steve took extra special care of a gift, at the print shop on my behalf. The gift recipient will be very pleased. But the bonus gift to me, in this situation, was the few minutes Steve and I talked about how precious children are. He and his lovely wife are expecting a child in mere weeks.  And of course I love my kids very much. It was a great conversation and I left feeling good about my family again.

I also learnt a valuable lesson, overall, today. Wear makeup! Apparently, without it I look like hell. Good to know! LOL  And if your friends can't tell you that.... get new friends.

Quietly I Toil

I haven't "done much" lately according to my family. And since my worth is measured in what I can do for them, it doesn't appear I'm worth much right now.

And it's January. So it's already tough to keep that inner voice of gloom quiet. But I try. Honestly I do. Sometimes they don't realize even how tough it is to get out of bed and take the dogs for a walk, to prepare dinner or to meet my obligations. But whatever, I guess. Everyone has problems. Why should I be any more noticeable?

Our pony went to a new home today. Nobody but me cared. Instead of asking if I was OK, or even ignoring the situation they asked. "When are you getting rid of the other one?" That hurt.

So, I guess today kinda sucked. I'm getting used to days like this. That sucks even more.

Go ahead and laugh

I woke up today and felt terrible. Nothing to blame but a cold or flu creeping in.

My whole body aches and I can barely hold my head up. But there are kids and dogs and a schedule. So after a brief tap of the snooze button I got up. Tylenol, coffee and a little Twitter did its best to wake me up. I didn't find much energy, but I did find the motivation to try.

I dressed in several layers and grabbed my iPod. Then I invited the dogs for a walk. I figured a little fresh air would do me good. The neighbour dog, an overweight, ignored lab came bounding at us. Instead of shooing him away, I invited him to come too. Now that was a happy dog face and tail wag!

We walked for quite a distance. The snow was deep. I was listening to my playlist "pick yourself up and fight." I was motivated. I thought I was feeling decent again. The dogs had the best time! Maybe I was going to just work thru this cold and malaise.

Feeling accomplished, I had one more tylenol and I was off to take the kids to hockey. I was pretty proud of myself for remembering all their equipment, sticks, water bottle etc. I even had granola bars and ipod chargers with me. Yeah, "I rock" I was thinking.

Gosh the drive was nice and roads were good. I was half way to the rink when it hit me.  I had the equipment, but I left the kids at school. Forgot to pick them up.

U-Turn.

Looking to the Future

I've been thinking a fair bit about what my future might look like. Where would I like to be in five years? What will I be doing? Where will I travel? How can I support and be close to my children when they are teens?

Right now I don't have any answers. I have spoken to a few friends who have given me some good advice and others who have helped me reflect on the past five years. It certainly has been an interesting lifestyle owning and operating restaurant. It's fast paced and offers new challenges daily.

Raising kids and animals has a whole other set of challenges. There's not really much I can say other than "stay tuned."

Things I'm working on this year

It's that time of the year to make a fresh start. I'm going to try to work on a few things myself. Putting it on paper makes me more accountable. So here goes:


1. I will try to simplify things whenever possible.

2. I will try to eat brighter coloured, more nutritious food. Things like raspberries and blackberries, dark leafy greens etc. The more NATURAL colour the better.

3. Sleep more

4. Stress less

5. Take better care of my skin.

5 Things to throw out TODAY

'Tis the season to purge the cupboards and closets and start fresh.

You really should throw out these 5 things, and never look back.

1. Spices that are older than THE Spice Girls comeback album. Ok, that's any herbs or spices more than 2 years old... they gotta go.

2. Makeup. If  it's more than 6 months old it has to go, especially mascara and anything that goes near your precious eyes.

3. Sauces. If you used it to BBQ last summer and not since, time to toss. Check your expiry dates on everything in your fridge, if it says 2013, it's done.

4. Pillows. If you've been breathing into it and drooling on it for more than a year, buh bye.

5. Toothbrush and toothpaste. If it's 60 days old, or you've recently had a cold, you need a new one.

Why... why are these things on the New Year's Hit List? 

One word. BACTERIA. 

It's a new year, start fresh. Please.

5 Things you can donate today that WILL make a difference.

If you are frustrated, like I am, at bureaucracy and organizational monsters that eat 80% of your cash donation and barely let anything trickle down to the intended source, then please consider my words.


5 Things that you can donate today that WILL make a difference in your own community: 

1. Pet food, blankets/towels to your humane society, rescue organizations and any organization dedicated to helping pets find homes. These are grass roots, local initiatives that are using consumables (pet food, litter) every day of the year. www.manitobamutts.org  http://www.fundsfurfriends.com/ http://www.earthdogterrierrescue.com/ http://www.brandonhumanesociety.ca http://www.darcysarc.ca/

2. Craft supplies, sewing supplies, magazines, mitts, boots & toques to your local school or daycare.  The home/school co-ordinator, secretary, or parent council members will use these consumables where they are most needed. These items will benefit kids. Who hasn't lost a mitt and needed a spare?

3. Fancy clothes - for lack of a better word: your suits and skirts, dressy jackets, ties and anything a person might wear to a job interview or personal celebration. You can donate these items anywhere. Whether it's Value Village, a women's shelter, or even a soup kitchen. People need decent clothes for job interviews. This is a genuine way to help.  And all people deserve to feel special or even
"appropriate" at their family birthdays, anniversaries, graduations etc. Have you ever skipped an event because you didn't want to be embarrassed by not fitting in?

4. Canned goods - it's important to keep emergency and long term supplies in our soup kitchens all year round.

5. Personal toiletries like toothbrushes, shampoo, tampons, socks, underwear, polysporin, bandaids, a comb, deodorant. Or coupons for these and similar items. These items can go along way to making a person feel "human" or presentable. Whether it's Siloam Mission, the Salvation Army, a church, a clinic or other place of your choosing, it will help. You may take these items for granted, but a person stretching their food budget or trying to keep a roof over their heads, may consider these luxury items.

If you can help people and/or animals in your own community, please do. 

Best of 2013

I shudder to think about writing this year in review. I pretty much hated this year and frankly, I can't wait for it to end and get a fresh start with 2014.  This is simply my raw, generalized opinion of the year as a whole. However, when I pause to consider events and activities as individual moments, there were some pretty good times. I'll try to focus on those.

So, in no particular order... my best memories of 2013: 

Best meal:  A crepe in a casino! I was absolutely sober, and it was mid-day, but damn that crepe from the Aria Hotel & Casino in Las Vegas was amazing! The raspberries were so fresh and flavourful you'd think they were photoshopped in your mouth! Karen & I had incredible meals that whole trip.

Where I should have sat to see the concert.  

Where I got to sit instead! 

Rod Stewart 12 feet away & singing my song! 

Best compliment: A concert usher, at Caesar's Palace said to me "you're too pretty to sit in the back row. Here, take these tickets and sit up front."  And that's how we saw the Rod Stewart concert from the good seats! Seriously, an unbelievably lucky moment.

Best song: Well, you see, Rod Stewart kinda sang "Some Guys Have All The Luck" to me, at the above mentioned concert. He was looking at me, winked, and was belting out his signature hit. So, yeah, that ROCKED!

Best bliss: Late January, on a heated patio, in Newport Beach California, I was sipping a raspberry lemon drop martini while the music of Simply Red quietly played in the background. My 7 year old son  was exhausted and completely enthralled with the events of the day. He drifted asleep next to me, telling me how much he loved being my travel buddy and just hanging out with me.

Best scream: I rode a roller coaster. It was California Screamin' at Disneyland, and boy did I scream!  And since I've spent a lifetime avoiding these types of rides and saying "I don't do roller coasters" it was a pretty big deal. I'm glad I did it. It's good to face your fears.

Best "why the hell not" moment:  I let my awesome hair dresser dip dye the ends of my blonde hair bright pink. What a great conversation starter and fun two weeks! It washed out and didn't stain my blonde hair. No harm at all.

Best silver lining. My 3 year old truck was damaged beyond your imagination during a routine oil change. The Titan needed a new transmission and a re-build on its engine. That was absolutely unbelievable and caused WEEKS of grief. During this time every man in my life and those associated with the issue talked down to me and did their best to make me feel like a stupid girl in a man's world. I hated that! Ultimately, the insurance of the dealership that destroyed my truck paid for all repairs, and in the end, I traded in the old truck for a brand new Titan. Of course there was 100% disclosure on the trade in. So, my "silver lining" in this experience was getting my first brand new vehicle ever. And it's silver. And I like it alot. Of course, I have to pay for it, and had to renegotiate my loan during this ordeal, but the dealership that sold me the new Titan was fantastic and really had my back in the process. Friends for life!

Best upgrade: $50 and a little Canadian charm got me upgraded from the basic room (read "cheapest room at the hotel") to the Bellagio Suite at the Bellagio Hotel in Vegas. The suite had 3 bathrooms, a living room, a dining room and just total overall awesomeness.  The robes were so awesome, I had to buy one! That robe makes me feel like a princess every time I put it on.

Best history experience:  Touching the space shuttle Adventure, as it was on display at the Johnson Space Centre in Houston Texas. Everything in that NASA museum was an incredible glimpse into history.... history that has pretty much happened in my parents' lifetime. That was cool. Really cool.

Best kid moment: When my little one took my hand and said "let's do this" and led me on stage to sing karaoke on our Disney cruise. We sang "our" song and did a heck of a job on it! I'd never ever sung karaoke before. That was another fear and check on the bucket list accomplished this year.

Best instant party: My son's hockey team won the championship and he hollers "free ice cream" in the locker room and invites everyone back to our diner for a celebration. Since it was only 9AM, I suggested we do pancakes instead. So, on about 20 minutes notice (about the time it takes the team to change out of their gear) we whipped up a championship pancake breakfast with bacon, yogurt, fruit and juice. Finally... having a restaurant comes in handy!

Best golf games: I golfed with my boys 3 times this year. That was fun. They are growing up so fast!

Us photo-bombing someone's cheesy
Vegas wedding pic! LOL

Best spontaneous trip: Vegas with Shelby! I think she casually asked over the counter at work, on a Thursday, and that very Monday we were on a plane. I really needed that escape. Gosh we had laughs! Even better than our "great" Grand Forks adventure of 2010.

Best work moment: Hosting a charity milkshake event to raise money for a family whose dad is stricken with cancer. I have never seen a community come together like that day. And the staff were unbelievable! We accomplished more that day than we'd dreamt of. We put $2000 in the hands of a good family, for all the right reasons. That is my most proud teamwork moment for certain, maybe ever.  Thinking about that day brings a tear to my eye.

Reflecting back on a year is a good thing. I'm breathing better now for having reminisced and really thought about the individual events and moments. It's hard to grasp why I say I hated this year so much when it was, indeed, filled with much laughter and the company of friends. My loved ones are healthy and still with us. My children continue to grow and pursue their passions. I continue to travel and surprise myself with courage and strength. I've even had some fun writing about my travels. So... what do I really have to complain about? Not a damn thing.

Cheers! Here's to 2014. May our lives be blessed with good health, good friends and great adventures!

A Few Things I'm Proud Of in a Life Without Regrets

Should I perish in some tragic accident, I shall rest peacefully knowing that I showed my kids how to live fully, and value their family and community.

I will never regret letting my toddlers eat off the good china. If we had company for dinner, it was a special occasion! We all celebrated together, even if the neighbours were just coming over for stew. No piece was ever damaged and the kids always loved having "fancy dinners."

I will never regret showing my children the lessons of charity. To give, to share and to honour your community is a critical citizenship lesson, in my humble opinion. Seeing my kids deliver Christmas Hampers, or even donate their old hockey sticks to the community centre, always makes me swell with pride.

I will never regret the time and money spent travelling with my children. Seeing the world and sharing the experiences brought us closer and gave us some amazing memories.

I will never regret baking cookies at midnight or hosting spontaneous dance parties. Even if it meant blasting the routine of bedtime or leaving a messy kitchen, it was so worth it. Family dance parties and kitchen limbo contests... well, that's some fun stuff.

I will never regret giving the kids a little spending money of their own, and showing them how to earn more. Chores are not evil. Helping to look after yourself, your home and your family is essential information. And hard work should be rewarded. Perhaps someday my kids will be employers and perhaps this lesson will resonate deeply.

I will never regret having animals in our house and in our lives. The doggie "siblings" were some of the first friends the kids had and they taught them so much about empathy, respect, responsibility, kindness, love and even health.  Some people say dogs are too much work. Well, for me, they complete a family. My house doesn't feel right without a dog.

I will never regret any money spent with their safety in mind. Whether it's a high end piece of hockey equipment or snow tires to take them to games safely, it's worth every penny. Insurance, bike helmets, seat belts and more were always in the budget. Keeping my kids safe, is, of course, priceless.

I will never regret any time spent writing. Whether it is in their journals, baby books, blogging here or even "I love you" notes in their lunches it will help them know who their mother is. And one thing they will know for certain, through my actions and words, is how much I love and cherish them.

5 Reasons Why I'm Not Afraid to Fail

1. I've done it enough. I'm starting to get good at it.... failing, that is.  The hard part used to be getting back up and dusting yourself off. But once that's mastered, there's really no stopping you. 

2. No one gives a crap anyway. Seriously. Movie stars and politicians are the ones who are grabbing headlines. And while it used to be "15 minutes of fame" whatever your blunder, it's history in milliseconds with today's social media. 

3. Fail isn't a catastrophe anymore, it's a hashtag. Baked cookies... dropped them on the floor! #fail 

4. Life without risks isn't living.  I couldn't live in a bubble. I would never want that for my children either. Bubble wrap is for wine glasses and Grandma's Christmas ornaments, not people. 

5. If it's not illegal or immoral, don't sweat it. If you want to lie about your weight or going over the Secret Santa gift exchange budget, that's ok too in my books. 

--------------

“Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes courage is the little voice at the end of the day that says I'll try again tomorrow.” ― Mary Anne Radmacher.

122 & Still Going Strong!

When you get a chance to realize your passion and pursue it, it's very fulfilling.

Such is the case for me in regards to travel and my writing. I can hardly believe, though, that I've been prolific enough to write 122 pieces on my own travel experiences in the last calendar year!

I've been in California, Nevada, Texas and North Dakota, Minnesota, Colorado and Georgia this year.

Thanks to the Disney Cruise (November) I can also add a few more exotic locations to the list. Those being Jamaica, Grand Cayman and Cozumel (but I don't really think it's fair to count that one as we did not get off the ship in Mexico.)

I work hard and travel is my "carrot." As long as I have a trip planned at some point in the future, I can work as hard as it takes to get there.

I love to experience new places, see new trends, and taste new cuisine.

If you'd like to read about some of my experiences, stop by the travel blog. You'll see some common threads, meet a few characters, and see plenty more palm trees!

www.escapethe204.blogspot.ca

Bucket List

Having a 'bucket list' has become about as common as wearing eyeglasses. And whether you have one or not, whether you've seen the movie or not, you GET the concept.

It's basically a very personal, very cool list of things you want to see and/or do before you "kick the bucket."  Glamourous slang isn't it?

My bucket list is a work-in-progress. I have a few little things that I want to do in the near future, and aspirations to have a grandiose list at some point. But in the meantime, I've realized I've done a whole lot of really cool things that IF I'd planned or could have dreamt up, then I probably would have had them on the list.

So maybe my list is a reverse list. A "been there, done that" list of very cool things that I've actually experienced.

In no particular order:

• Took my kids to Hawaii
• Met Teemu Selanne and talked "Jets" with him for a few minutes. And he signed his hockey card. 
• Sat front row at the Katy Perry concert in the Bahamas. A concert for 400 people in the ball room. She was on top of the charts and days later announced a world tour. 
• Sat behind home plate at a sold out one-night-only MLB game 
• Accidentally ended up in the NY Yankees' office. Saw their World Series trophies on display. 
• Spontaneously went to an Eastern Finals game in the NHL. Was awed by the goalie (Tim Thomas) who would win the Vezna trophy and a Stanley Cup just weeks later.
• Saw the first NHL game between the Coyotes and the Jets 2.0
• Saw future Hall-Of-Fame Quarterback Brett Favre play live. 
• Came within 4 feet of a very rare Tiger Shark (backstage aquarium tour) 
• Did lots of watersliding through shark tanks
• Had my photo taken with Mickey Mouse
• Saw the Disney castle, and shed a tear. 
• Saw a full size gingerbread house at the Grand Floridian hotel, at "fake" Christmas
• Wrote a book that spent several weeks on a Best-Sellers List
• Ran for public office
• Touched the Pacific and the Atlantic oceans in the same year
• Climbed to the top of a (small) mountain
• Saw U2, Rolling Stones, Bon Jovi, Aerosmith, Prince and Def Leopard in concert(s)
• Stayed at the Bellagio Hotel in Vegas
• Bought a struggling restaurant and turned it into a veritable hot spot
• Catered "lunch" at 2AM to a movie set for a big name actor
• Rode a huge roller coaster & overcame my life-long fear. 
• Owned a convertible and a classic car

It sure sounds awesome when you put it in a list! I really had no idea that I'd lived such an exciting decade. It sure sounds that way. I can hardly believe that's me...my life. When I look in the mirror... I see a dull boring person, with no social life, who obsesses about work and family. I see a woman getting older by the minute and missing out on more than I participate in. But maybe I need a new mirror... that all sounds pretty adventuresome and dynamic to me right now. 

What will the future hold? I'm pretty excited to find out and keep the list growing! 

My Tribute to Oreo

Oreo.  Where can I start?

Oreo was a dog, grateful for her home and people every day of her life. She was an orphan... a stray... a homeless lost puppy, found on January 8th, 1997. It was a bitterly cold day and she was found downtown, huddled under a car. She was dirty and hungry, and according to the vet's expert opinion "dumped downtown, an unwanted Christmas gift." He told me, "She'll be a perfectly good dog and love you forever if you just clean her up and give her a home."

He was right. So VERY right!

Oreo was more than just "good." She was gentle and smart and oh so very loving. Really, "grateful" is the best and only word to describe how she was and lived every day.

Fast forward to how she literally changed our lives.... Oreo was a lively, border collie insatiable for exercise and play. We started off walking her. Then running with her. Then riding a bike. Then biking miles and miles through the woods. Then we brought in a canine playmate, Mocha.  Ultimately, we chose to move out to a country house so that they could have enough space to play and roam. I even rode horseback and those "energizer bunnies" bolted along the trails hours at a time.

When the kids were born she took on the role of hall monitor. She knew who was coming and going and had one eye on each of them at all times. But she was hardly interactive. She left the role of "nanny" to Mocha, the labrador/dalmatian dog. Oreo, though gentle and loving, had no interest in kids climbing all over her and tugging at her ears.

Though mild mannered and sweet like a cookie, Oreo was never going to back down in the face of danger. If her people were threatened she never hesitated to take charge. Like the time we encountered a coyote on the trail and she ran him off. Or the time another dog came racing at the kids, and she let out a bark 4 times her size.  She never ceased to amaze me.

In her latter years she could be found curled up on the floor at your feet, or underneath a table. Never very far from her people... always in the room and keeping a watchful eye. Every night in the yard, she'd meet me in the driveway. That's one of the things I have missed the most. I swear she could hear our vehicles a mile away.

When I call her a Border Collie, it was mostly about her habits and instincts, and of course her looks. But did we ever really know the genetics of our mutt? No. But she was brilliant and agile, loyal and loving and absolutely steadfast in her dedication to her family. To me, she was everything a border collie embodies. And a herder! Such a good herder.

She was a mischievous little clown at times too. She'd steal the whole chicken breast off your plate if you left for 10 seconds to grab something from the fridge!  She'd lock eyes with you, and do it anyways if she ever got caught in the act! From underneath the table, to on your chair and out the door with your chicken before you could holler her name!

And there was no fencing that dog either! Over, under, through.... didn't matter. Whatever it took to get out, she'd do it. There really was no point ever trying to contain her.

She hated swimming, but loved going to the lake.  She loved to play chase with you, but never fetch. Try getting her to fetch and you would be the one running after the ball. It was "beneath her" and you got that glare every time you tried.

I remember that she loved digging her own carrots out of the garden. And though no dog treats ever drove her wild... shortbread cookies at Christmas time were absolutely her all-time favourites. If you tried lifting a shortbread to your mouth, she'd leap into your lap and snatch it out of your hand before it ever touched your lips. She was crazy that way! And I loved it!

Mocha LOVED ice cream. Oreo didn't care either way. Oreo would let Mo lick every drop of it and she'd still be wagging her tail all happy and content to have the empty cup after.

Mocha spent her time sleeping on the kids' beds, while Oreo was always at my feet. She had this little thing about curling up in the warm spot the minute you'd leave the bed in the morning. Turn around for a second and she'd be curled up next to your pillow.

I really miss her, still. She was my first doggie and taught me so many things. She was really ill once at 12 years and managed to bounce back. I certainly considered the 4 years after to be bonus time. I was really grateful for the bonus time. We had some great walks, some great cuddles and some great memories together in those last years.

The day she left to find her resting place I was devastated. I didn't want her to die alone. I knew something was up because she was more tired than usual and had refused to eat her favourite wet dog food that morning. (I used to feed her privately, out of sight of the puppy, so she wouldn't be rushed and could get every morsel herself.) Well, that day I put her dog food back in the fridge and labelled it "Oreo." She went outside to the yard. That night when I got home from work she didn't greet me and just could not be found.

We searched and searched well past midnight, and then again at dawn the next day. I must have called her name a hundred times. Out property is densely treed and the grass was so thick she could have been anywhere, we just couldn't see her. I was so upset. I just wanted to find her.

Then just after lunch she stumbled out into the yard into plain sight. She was limp and disoriented but alive. I scooped her up into my arms and told her everything I needed to say. I petted her lovingly and the kids did the same. There's no way she should have been alone at the end. As fiercely independent as she was, she needed her family that day and her family needed her. I was so grateful she changed her mind and came home. That was my Oreo... she knew I needed her and if it took her last ounce of strength, she was going to be at my side 'til the end.

I don't consider it a sad ending. I consider it the perfect ending to a good life of canine-human companionship. She loved us and we loved her. We gave Oreo...and Mocha too, the best years and the best times and they gave us theirs.

Forever grateful,
Cathie


(Oreo was buried alongside her canine sister, Mocha. May they both rest in peace.)

Raising a Spoilt Border Collie

Our Belle, is a great dog. She's still young, and has more energy than an atom, but she's still an absolutely great dog! I love her like crazy.  She's never going to replace the love and lifetime with Oreo and Mocha, but she's definitely part of this family and we're having lots of fun together.

What she has taught me already is that we spoil her. And you know for certain you have a spoilt dog when:

1) they get more bed space than you do

2) they are absolutely insulted when you buy generic dog treats

3) when the "no dogs allowed" rule (for new furniture) lasts 2 days

4) when she destroys your shoes and you say, "they were uncomfortable and I didn't like them anyway" and toss the shoes without even scolding her

5) never finish a meal without giving them a taste

6) you turn the volume down on the TV so you don't wake the sleeping dog next to you

7) your dog has more toys than you ever did

8) you spend more time and money in pet stores than you do the hair salon

9) if you have ever considered doggie daycare

10) have monogrammed ornaments and a stocking for your dog at Christmas

Pretty quiet. But not pretty at all!

I've been pretty quiet lately. I've hardly done any writing. This is because I'm on auto-pilot.

After working the last 55 consecutive days, without a day off, I'm basically a robot. A robot with deteriorating looks and deteriorating ability to function.

A regular customer, a person I would even consider a friend, summed it up the other day like this: "Cath... Aw, you look like crap. I mean, you'll bounce back, but how much more of this can you take?"

All I heard was "you'll bounce back" and I'm thinking.... I usually CAN, but what if I CAN'T this time? What if there is no amount of $200 eye cream and night serum that will ever restore my outer glow? Lord knows at this point, the inner "glow" is pretty much gone.

So, I agree, 55 days is not healthy. Not a good idea. I wouldn't recommend it.  But truthfully, days 35-45 were the hardest. I was still hoping for a day off at that point. Now, I've pretty much given up wanting/hoping/expecting/planning for a day off, and that, frankly, that has made it easier. Now that I've resigned myself to the fact that each day the sun rises and sets, I must attend to the restaurant... I'm ok with it. I know what I need to do.

Failure simply isn't an option. Either is getting sick. On that note, I'd highly recommend Cold-FX and washing your hands 800 times a day. It works. Seriously.

Now some days are easier than others. And an 8 hour day feels like a cake walk. It's practically a day off kind of feeling. Even the kids are in shock and awe if I'm home in daylight. Mom... you're home??? It's not, "Mom... you're home!!!" It's said with a much more suspicious and "what's wrong" kind of tone.

Mondays used to be my favourite day. Kind of a slack day, meant for cleaning and getting caught up at work. And now, the last 2 Mondays have been complete and total, unpredictable, you-would-not-believe-me-if-I-told-you kind of gong show days. I'm pretty much scared of Mondays now. So I think I will just stick to referring to days of the week, by their numbers. As in, hey.... happy day 56.

So I'm just going to stop typing now and pretty much shut up. I'm sure we both agree this isn't pretty.

Don't worry.... I'll bounce back. Maybe.

You know you're tired when....

...you can fall asleep sitting in a chair working. I believe I sat upright and slept hours last night with my hands on a keyboard.The last thing I saw was 4AM on the clock. Doing schedules and analyzing data and planning promotions. That's glamourous stuff to be doing all night.

...you know you are tired when: you put ketchup on your own hot dog. And you don't even like ketchup!

...you know you are tired when you can't find the words any more and just point to things as a means of expressing what you want.

...you know you're tired when you consider coffee as a priority, not a beverage.

--you know you're tired when you fall asleep before the child you're reading to.

...you know you're tired when you start setting 6 alarms in the morning because you already sleep through the first 5.