Not another day.

I don't believe in a lot of things.

I don't believe in soul mates. I don't believe in luck, magic or anything really but hard work and timing.

But I do believe in ghosts. And I do believe those that you love and lose, never leave.

Case in point... my grandpa was my best friend. He was one of the greatest influences in my life, if not the greatest. Today is his birthday, though he passed away 18 years ago. March 27th always messes me up.  His wife, my grandmother, also died on the 27th.

It's also a day that I have to work. Have to. It's not something I can avoid. It's ok really, it's kind of fitting considering how incredibly hard he worked.  I get the uncommon work ethic from him.  That, and the 26th, a very privately difficult day, makes for a heck of an emotional week for me.

So here's my story:  I've been dreading this day for a while. I nearly burst into tears just looking at the calendar. And here it is again.

I'm sitting quietly and calmly watching TV alone just before midnight on the 27th and a song pops into my head. (Today, just now!) All the lyrics are clear as day. It makes me sing along, out loud, then laugh. Then I burst into happy tears. My grandpa had one song he sang. One song! I can't say that I heard it often, but it was the only one I ever remember and it brought such a smile to his face, and mine. As a kid I'd sing along.

The hilarity of the song is its irony. My grandpa was the most humble, modest, polite, gentle and hard working character. He did not drink alcohol, never smoked and was more honest and kind than anyone I'll ever know. The song is "Oh Lord, It's Hard to Be Humble." Even writing the title makes me crack a smile. And I can't help but laugh and smile when I hear it. And it's pretty impossible to be sad when you're singing along instinctively. It's a comical song!

Funny "fate" moment was when I bought my jukebox for my restaurant.... a huge, scary, leap of faith that was... I got a bunch of 45s with the jukebox. One of them was "his" song.  It made me think in some way it was a sign from him and that I would be "okay."

Coincidentally, I also signed the deal to the restaurant with a Viking Motors pen. A completely random pen that was on the counter at the Diner. That sent shivers to my core, because my other grandfather was the founder of Viking Motors. And believe me, there was no reason for that pen to be in that Diner, far far away from the town in which the dealership existed many years before. No reason at all for anyone to hand me that pen to ink the deal to sign and buy my restaurant.

Do my grandfathers keep a watchful eye on me? Yes. I believe they do.

Does it make me feel better? Yes. Yes it does. Because here on earth, I'm too stubborn, independent, driven, proud, bull headed and ridiculous to let any man take care of me.

I'm not sure my grandfathers would be completely proud of me. I do drink, swear, stay up late, and gamble a bit... but those are pretty rare occasions. 95% of everything I do I believe they'd smile and say "that's my girl."

So cheers Grandpa! I'll be making your favourite pie later today and singing our song. I miss you still. And always. Grandma too.

"Oh Lord, it's hard to be humble... when you're perfect in every way. I can't wait to look in the mirror... I get better looking each day! To know me is to love me. I must be a hell of a man. Oh Lord it's hard to be humble... but I'm doing the best that I can.

..... Some say that I'm egotistical, but I don't even know what that means! I guess it's got something to do with the way that I fill out my skin tight blue jeans! Ohhhhhh Lord it's hard to be humble...." 

xo

The Best Version of Me

The best version of me, is a 7 year old boy. Or at least that's how I see things when I look at my son.

He's a boy who knows when to give me a hug and he also knows when to say, "Mom, let's ditch this place and go have some fun."

"Hey Mom.... the music's not loud enough. I don't think the neighbours can hear it yet!"

Yes, he's a character. But he also has a work ethic. You might think that statement is ridiculous, unless you've seen him play hockey. If you've seen him play hockey and then you've seen the serious side that makes this defenseman a superstar. He gets in a zone before games... he's thinking about the opponents, his strategy, the goaltender and the best angles to score from.  I'm not kidding. Don't even try to have a non-hockey conversation with him pre-game.

Cj also loves seafood.... just like his mama. We were visiting Disneyworld last year and it was our scheduled day to tour Animal Kingdom. We're getting ready to leave the hotel for the park and he says to me... "Mom, what do you say we ditch Animal Kingdom and just go downtown and eat crab legs and have a drink on the deck? You know, we'll go to Fultons. It'll be way better!"

We'd been to Fulton's once before and enjoyed it. But that was 2 years earlier, when he was 4! Anyways, who am I to argue with the "better version of me" so that's exactly what we did... we went and had a leisurely day. I shelled over a pound of crab while he lapped it up and sipped his virgin margarita.

When we were in California, on our little hockey adventure, we had a blissful 2 hour lunch on the patio at Bloomingdales just people watching and savouring the 3 course lunch. Hard to believe any small boy would tolerate a 2 hour lunch... but mine does.

Don't ever offer him a Happy Meal... unless you want to get beat up. Lol!

He's a gem on a plane. He's 'Caesar Milan' with animals and he's a saint with his grandparents. He's brilliant in spelling and a 2x champion in the hockey leagues. He's 'Sergio Garcia" on the golf course... a natural, with spirit.

Did I mention he has model good looks, impeccable manners and looks dashing in a tuxedo?

I'm so proud to be his mama. I like to think he has taken the best of me and improved upon it and made it his own. It still scares me sometimes... to hear my words from his lips... to share his thoughts and predict his next move as if it were my own.  He'll make his own mistakes, as I have made mine. But I just hope he has a good foundation to grown on and continues to make his days fulfilling and happy.

The twisted path

You never know the path life will take, but you can be certain it will have ups and downs. Sometimes there are curves, other times it can get all twisted and down right confusing. If you're lucky, it all straightens itself out.

Each of us has a story to tell. Some people though are more expressive. Some... like myself, are writers. You simply can NOT stop the stories. You could ask me why I love the number 5, and I would probably take you on a ten minute journey that includes the race track, a certain horse, and a time in the 1980's when it wasn't socially acceptable to take you kids to the track.

Sounds interesting, doesn't it?

I'm a storyteller. Can't beat that out of me. Now, sure, Twitter and its 140 character limit has tried. But.... I can get creative with abbreviations.

Today's story, however, goes in another direction. I was thinking about my career path and what, if anything, might be next.

16 years ago I was sitting at a desk, typing in planting directions for the back of seed packets. It was a graphic design job and I adored it. Then one evening, I was helping with a neighbor's roses when a second neighbor stopped in and mentioned a new job that was being created in his school district. The big selling point was the salary.... and I applied. It took a few interviews, and one amazing reference from an amazing lady who believed in me (more than I believed in myself) and voila... my career path took a turn.

Fast forward several years and I was still absolutely loving my job. I worked for the best people. I truly had the greatest boss. Everyday I had new challenges. Every week I felt smarter and more capable. And then my amazing coworkers and bosses started to retire, and some moved out of province to further their own careers. That's when things took a turn. It was a pretty dramatic and ugly turn, and it was soon after that I found myself looking for a new path.

I did a total 180 and went completely in another direction, buying a struggling restaurant. I turned it into a popular diner and haven't stopped to look back since.  Until today. What a strange sequence of events... from carrot seeds to restaurant owner.

Do I regret a thing? Not a chance. Do I know what's next? Nope.... but there really should be an APP for that.

My heart is in it

The other day I was interviewed by the local newspaper regarding my small business. "What is it like to be a small business owner in the community?"

My answers started off fairly typical, talking about staffing, taxes, market challenges etc. However, it quickly turned to anecdotal stories of life in the neighborhood.

I shared stories of successes and of the people we see regularly. I noted how important they are to the health and vibrancy of the business. I talked about the babies who have been born and who now join their parents for ice cream treats. I talked about how much I love seeing the kids grow and turn into little people with their own preferences and quirks.

I talked about the seniors who sip their coffees and the teens that bring their dates. It's just what goes on. And to me, it's much more important than the numbers. I really think what we do, in the diner, contributes to the neighborhood. And I think we contribute to the memories people share with their loved ones.

I'm not saying it's not hard. I'm not saying that working 7 days a week doesn't have its drawbacks. Not everything is hearts, flowers and rainbows. It's a business. But it's more, to me, than a job. It's raising my family and contributing to the lives of others too.

That's why I do it. I enjoy it. And they say, "if you're heart's in it, then it's not really work"... is it?

A little shopping

I haven't done much shopping this winter. A pair of shoes and a purse for me, but for the most part it's been hockey equipment for the boys.

Shopping is not a hobby of mine. I prefer to get in and get out, rather than meander. I guess I'm kind of a "guy" that way.

However,  I do like a little on-line shopping and FREE SHIPPING DAY (December 15th - ish) is my favourite way to do the whole Christmas shopping thing. This brings me to today's point.... Orb Clothing.

Orbclothing.ca is a Canadian company out of Vancouver. They make relaxed clothing, of exceptional quality, in a responsible and ethical manner. I "discovered" them on free shipping day when I purchased a sweatshirt. I have since made 2 additional purchases and each time I am awestruck by the detail and effort they put into producing a quality garment. The whole philosophy of their business and manner in which they conduct themselves is very "Mountain Equipment Co-op of the 1990s" to me. (And that's a very good thing.)

They also know how to throw a sale. Seriously good sales. (Like this weekend when they offered 75% off Winter merchandise plus free shipping.) Use the link above and they will send you a $10 coupon just for giving them a try. 

I bought a jacket. I expect it will last for years and years and years. Unlike the mass-made crap you find in every chain store.  The seams, the details and the thoughtful Canadian climate touches make this jacket simply outstanding.

Anyways.... one last bargain before my weary head hits the pillow tonight.... Shoppers Drug Mart has great deals in their grocery section on until Thursday this week. (March 14th). Christie crackers (like Ritz and Triscuit) are on for $1.99. They also have all their microwavable Lean Cuisine/Stouffers (I like the lasagna) on sale for $1.99. Those are great for lunches and for those of us too lazy to cook for ourselves after a long work day. Shredded cheese and taco kits were each $3.99 and Cheerios were $1.99.  Lots of great grocery items to fill your cart with, plus you get their Optimum points. Win-win.

Day 1

Today was the first official, in-house day of the 2013 ice cream season.  For those in the back benches, it's not my first day working this year. (Hold the snickering please.) But it's the first day I scrubbed a shelf and ordered stock AND spent 9 hours at the building.

I also did a lot of shovelling. Damn there was a lot of snow this weekend.

Anyways, all I wanted to say was that today was a good day. It was a great way to start. I talked to all our suppliers (except for the guy from Coke who always seems too busy to call back little old me), service people and even a few neighbours.  Everyone was happy to chat and share a laugh. That's the kind of "day one" I like to have.

I also had lots of help and enthusiasm from my staff. That's good too. I NEED their support.

I'm excited to go back for Day 2. I have high hopes for Day 3. Four is a good number, so I'll be there too. Five is my lucky number so I'm going to shine that day.

Don't you just love that new season optimism? I do.

Happy Anniversary!

It's been a year since we met and I fell head over heels for my sweetie. Together we've seen rain and sleet and snow; good times and bad. We've gone on several hockey road trips and had a blast. I'm sure we've been to the grocery store 400 times, and hauling all those supplies.... he never minds.

At first I wasn't sure he was the one for me. After all, he's kind of a big lug. I'm kind of a little thing. Of course, no one would suggest I was a girly-girl, but still. It's not like we look like a matched set.

I am a little bossy, but he handles it like a pro. Whether I want to go off-roading or weaving through traffic he suits the course.

Not once has he complained when I sing along to the radio or use my ipod for some obnoxious pre-game hockey music that the kids like.

Gosh I love the big lug! He makes me feel safe. Safe and warm and totally protected. What more could a girl want? So.... happy anniversary, Titan. My Nissan Titan! Cheers to us and the many miles we have ahead!

They came calling

A couple months ago I noted that I was done with the Tropicana Hotel in Vegas. We were broken up, through, done!  I was moving on. They had new ownership and we were just going in different directions.

Of course, secretly, I hoped that they would miss me and want me back.

But I didn't hear from them.... for the longest time. That is, until this weekend. I got an e-mail saying that they missed me. They really wanted to see me again and show me how they were changing. They even promised me a free night.... as long as we could spend the weekend together again. LOL

Even though I know I should try new places, I did have good times at the Tropicana. I am kinda tempted. BUT, and this is a big BUT..... in their "I want you back" script.... they called me KATHRYN.  Who the hell is KATHRYN. And with a "K."

This seems like a form letter gone bad. Perhaps they don't really know me. Maybe they never did. Maybe they just blew their chance!