Travelling Solo With Your Child

To travel is a gift. To travel solo with your child is an incredible gift and I treasure it.

I have done it a few times, and I will do it again. While I have two children, I like to take the occasional vacation with them individually.

My older son and I recently returned from a hockey road trip. If this sounds like an old story repeated, it's not. There is hockey constantly! LOL  It was three fantastic days on the road, sharing music, stories, food and adventure.  This time we also had the privilege of staying with our extended family and getting to know them better. Truly a special memory.

Note, I didn't drone on about hockey and our wins/loses? We are a hockey family, but winning isn't everything. Memories and shared experiences outweigh the win category every time.

Within 48 hours of returning the one son, I took off with the other. The younger boy and I then headed south to California. Head over to my travel blog to read my hotel reviews and see how much I loved California. (I'll make regular entries there, but it will take me a few days to get all my stories out.)

My younger son, toils constantly to keep up with his brother. There is on-going rivalry and posturing. A solo trip is a break from that. The younger one can be himself. He can cuddle if he wants to cuddle, express his thoughts and do things at his own pace without ridicule. Never once on our trip did I have to yell "get your hands off your brother! You two separate! Stop it!!" It was a break for me, since I always feel like I'm refereeing with those two.

There are a few key points to note when traveling solo with your child.

1. Make sure to have a consent letter for travel from your spouse (very important whether you are married or not.) In this letter, specify your dates, flights and destination. Include your hotel address and any tickets or plans you have. Contact phone numbers for your spouse that you can reach promptly if you are held up at airport security with questions.  If you can have a lawyer notarize your letter, it's preferable.

2. A thorough and detailed plan if you get separated accidentally in a restaurant or airport etc. Practice it.

3. Bright clothing easily recognized by each of you. It sounds trivial, but if you are separated in a store even by a few feet, you want to be INSTANTLY recognizable.

4. Thoroughly researched destination, with safety measures considered. For example, I was taking C to an NHL hockey game in a big city. We knew there would be a sold out crowd. I chose to pay a few extra dollars to buy club seats for us - knowing that the club level had restricted access, lots of security, fewer patrons and a far better washroom ratio. Why is this important?  At this age we go into separate gender washrooms. I could not allow him in good conscience to stand in a line of strangers for 20 minutes unattended to use the washroom. Club seats and facilities meant a 2 minute or less line and a far greater level of comfort and limited separation anxiety for both of us.

5. Do something special of the child's choosing. C wanted to go walking in the rain with an umbrella. He also wanted the waitress to bring him a fancy kid's cocktail on the patio. Easy, peasy!  I also try to arrange something indulgent that will be a special memory specific to that child. I can assure you my hockey-loving boy will never forget meeting Teemu Selanne pre-game and then watching the game from the padded club seats.

When I find myself on these one-on-one vacations, there is far more opportunity for me to relax. I feel like a better parent, and a human being again rather than a referee. Of course I enjoy family vacations with everyone together, and it is great to have another adult present to share the responsibility and security duties, but I often find myself needing a rest after those vacations.  This California adventure, though short, did the trick. I feel recharged and like I'm ready to get back in the game.